""Good judgment comes from experience; and a lot of that comes from bad judgment" - Will Rogers Posts: 3485 | From: Beautiful Newaygo, Michigan | Registered: Mar 2003
| IP: Logged |
posted
Blonde driving in country came across another blonde out in a corn field, rowing a boat, going nowhere....stepping out of her car, first blonde shouted out to rowing blonde that it was blondes like her that gave them all a bad name and if she could swim, she'd come out there and kick her butt.....
-------------------- Frank Magoo, Magoo's-Las Vegas; fmagoo@netzero.com "the only easy day was yesterday" Posts: 2365 | From: Las Vegas, Nv. | Registered: Jun 2003
| IP: Logged |
Hey guys, I'm sorry if the above picture misrepresents our relationship... I think this would be a more accurate picture of my wife's normal feelings toward me.
/Seriously //If I don't post on here for a few days... ///You may want to put a call the Homicide Investigator
-------------------- Jon Jantz Snappysign.com jjantz21@gmail.com http://www.allcw.com Posts: 3395 | From: Atmore, AL | Registered: Nov 2005
| IP: Logged |
posted
A police officer pulls a blonde over for swerving all over the road- he asks her what seems to be the problem, she hysterically replies: "I was just driving along and out of nowhere a tree comes out right in front of me, so I swerve, and then another tree comes right out in front of me, so I swerve again... it just keeps on happening- trees coming out of nowhere, I just had to swerve to miss them"
"Ma'am that's your air freshener"
-------------------- Michael Clanton Clanton Graphics/ Blackberry 19 Studio 1933 Blackberry Conway AR 72034 501-505-6794 clantongraphics@yahoo.com Posts: 1736 | From: Conway Arkansas | Registered: Oct 2001
| IP: Logged |
posted
Bear hunter is out in the woods and comes onto a stream. He sees a beautiful blande across the way and yells out to her how to get the the otherside. She yells back,"You already are!"
-------------------- Preston McCall 112 Rim Road Santa Fe, New Mexico 87501 text: 5056607370 Posts: 1552 | From: Santa Fe, New Mexico | Registered: Nov 1998
| IP: Logged |
A blind man wanders into a Female Biker Bar by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders some coffee. After sitting there for awhile, he yells to the bartender, 'Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?' The bar immediately falls absolutely silent. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, 'Before you tell that joke, sir, I think it's only fair, given that you're blind, that you should know five things:
1) The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.
2) The bouncer is a blonde girl.
3) I'm a 6 foot tall, 175 lb. blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
4) The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a weightlifter.
5) The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.
Now, think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?'
The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head and says 'no' not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times.
-------------------- Rollie Eldred Ashtabula, OH
"Making the World Beautiful...One Sign at a Time!" Posts: 66 | From: Ashtabula, OH (Really Saybrook-on-the-lake) | Registered: Dec 2007
| IP: Logged |
""Good judgment comes from experience; and a lot of that comes from bad judgment" - Will Rogers Posts: 3485 | From: Beautiful Newaygo, Michigan | Registered: Mar 2003
| IP: Logged |
posted
Blonde in a heavy snowstorm is following a snowplow. Every move the snowplow makes she follows. The snowplow driver wonders what gives and gets out. He asks the blonde what she is doing. The blode relied with "my father told me if I ever got caught out in the snow, to follow the snow plow. Is it OK that I follow you?" The driver replied, "I guess so, as soon as I get done here with K-Mart, I'm going across the street to do the Wal Mart lot".
-------------------- George Perkins Millington,TN. goatwell@bigriver.net
"I started out with nothing and still have most of it left"
posted
Blonde truck driver drives into a fog bank, to amazement of driver behind her, she comes backing back out of it, when driver following queries her as to why, she said, "When I left home, my dispatcher told me if I ran into any fog, to back out of it."
-------------------- Frank Magoo, Magoo's-Las Vegas; fmagoo@netzero.com "the only easy day was yesterday" Posts: 2365 | From: Las Vegas, Nv. | Registered: Jun 2003
| IP: Logged |
posted
How do you know a blonde has been working on your computer? There's White-out in the screen.
-------------------- Jane Diaz Diaz Sign Art 628 W. Lincoln Ave. Pontiac, Il. 61764 815-844-7024 www.diazsignart.com Posts: 4102 | From: Pontiac, IL USA | Registered: Feb 1999
| IP: Logged |
posted
A man met a beautiful blonde lady and decided he wanted to marry her right away. She said, 'But we don't know anything about each other.' He said, 'That's all right, we'll learn about each other as we go along.'
So she consented, they were married, and off they went on a honeymoon at a very nice resort. One morning they were lying by the pool, when he got up off of his towel, climbed up to the 10 meter board and did a two and a half tuck, followed by three rotations in the pike position, at which point he straightened out and cut the water like a knife. After a few more demonstrations, he came back and lay down on the towel. She said, 'That was incredible!' He said, 'I used to be an Olympic diving champion. You see, I told you we'd learn more about each other as we went along.'
So she got up, jumped in the pool and started doing lengths. After seventy -five lengths she climbed out of the pool, lay down on her towel and was hardly out of breath. He said, 'That was incredible! Were you an Olympic endurance swimmer?' 'No,' she said, 'I was a hooker in Pittsburgh and I worked both sides of the River."
-------------------- Jane Diaz Diaz Sign Art 628 W. Lincoln Ave. Pontiac, Il. 61764 815-844-7024 www.diazsignart.com Posts: 4102 | From: Pontiac, IL USA | Registered: Feb 1999
| IP: Logged |