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» The Letterville BullBoard » Letterhead/Pinstriper Talk » O.T. JOKES (something to offend everyone)

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Author Topic: O.T. JOKES (something to offend everyone)
Regina Rae
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Member # 4024

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SOMETHING TO OFFEND EVERYONE!

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?
Juan on Juan.

What is a Yankee?
The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.

What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover ?
The position of the dirt bag.

Why is divorce so expensive?
Because it's worth it.

What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over?
Doughnuts?

Why is air a lot like sex?
Because it's no big deal unless you're not getting any.

What do you call a smart blonde?
A golden retriever.

What do attorneys use for birth control?
Their personalities.

What's the difference between a girlfriend and wife?
45 lbs.

What's the difference between a boyfriend and husband?
45 minutes.

Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and
good-looking?
Because those men already have boyfriends.

What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.

What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.

Why don't bunnies make noise when they have sex?
Because they have cotton balls.

What's the difference between a porcupine and BMW?
A porcupine has the pricks on the outside.

What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?
"Are you sure it's mine?"

Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex?
Mace will do that to you.

Why did OJ Simpson want to move to West Virginia ?
Everyone has the same DNA.

Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
Breasts don't have eyes.

Why do drivers' education classes in Redneck schools use the car only on
Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays?
Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the Sex Ed class uses it.

Where does an Irish family go on vacation?
A different bar.

Did you hear about the Chinese couple that had a retarded baby?
They named him "Sum Ting Wong.

What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other?
A speech impediment.


What's the difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo?
A southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage
along with... "a recipe".

How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the F word?
Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*!

What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern
fairytale?

A northern fairytale begins "Once upon a time..." A southern fairytale
begins "Y'all ain't gonna believe this ****..."

Why is there no Disneyland in China ?
No one's tall enough to go on the good rides.

Have a Great Day

--------------------
Regina Rae
Red Apple Design
Ringgold, GA

Posts: 46 | From: Ringgold, GA | Registered: Jul 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Barbara Murrell
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Member # 3879

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[Eek!] Yep there's something there to offend everyone. Lets hope they can all have a sense of humour and not get to politically correct.

I though they were all funny and brighened my morning. Thanks Regina [Rolling On The Floor]
Barb xx

--------------------
Barbara Murrell
4 Elements (Global)Ltd
Ware Herts
England
barbara@4elementsglobal.com

Posts: 87 | From: England | Registered: May 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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