'Twas two weeks before Christmas, and all through the town Heads were all talking and goofing around.
There were questions about vinyl and the usage of smalt Sign kits, and speculation of locking Jill in a vault
The panels were hung by the chimney with care, In hopes that dear Santa Claus soon would be there.
Barb in her babushka and Steve in his cap had just settled down for a short pre-chat nap.
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter, Barb sprang from her bed to see what was the matter.
She turned on her puter and waited for the boot, then crept to the den to investigate the soot.
It was drifting like black snow from the mantle beneath making dust on the hearth and all over her wreath.
She crept to the fireplace to ponder this pickle and sneezed when the soot made her little nose tickle.
Barb backed up in terror and sat on the couch from the depths of the chimney a voice hollered "OUCH!"
In amazement she watched as Santa squeezed out... "It's too early for Christmas!" she said with a pout.
"I know, Lovely Lady," Father Christmas replied. "But you see, I was merely just taking a ride."
"My new sled has been striped and gilded galore... I wanted you to post pix, I've not tried it before!"
Barb gladly agreed and fetched her digi-cam She snapped twenty shots while Santa ate ham.
When the photos were shown on the portfolio page The Heads all pronounced the sleigh all the rage.
Santa responded by showering our town with cool gifts and paint and kazan quills of brown.
Barb got a new sofa, Steve got a red thong Kissy a sign shop, Joey a bong.
Nettie was given a bed for her cat Fran got a ball-gag...imagine that!
BOB got a jar of sour grape sorbet Stevo a '63 red Chevrolet.
Donna in BC got some toys for her kid Felix some paint with a matching lid.
Dan was given some Ativan OP got his own special souped up van
Si was given an array of figs Several bald Heads were given wild wigs.
Karen recieved a bar of soap but not for her mouth, it was soap-on-a rope.
Mike Meyer got a saw to raffle at his Muster Jeff Ogden got pearl powder with a beautiful luster.
Rapid Ray got a big stack of kool comic books Harris got a firetruck complete with hooks.
Kelly got a big stuffed Winnie the Pooh Jeff Lang a bag of smalts, in dark blue.
Jane Diaz got her own boob-requesting surveyer Stephen Deveau a 1970's record player
This tale could go on for quite some time However it is getting harder to rhyme!
Suffice it to say that we are all good folks Some spats here and there and some very good jokes...
Anyone who's ommitted...forgive me for slipping I've inhaled too much horse glue when I was out chipping!
Just wanted us all to "get in the mood" Christmas will soon arrive at our 'hood!
LOVE YINS! SILLY JILLY Posted by Kissymatina (Member # 2028) on :
ROFLMAO. Thank you Silly Jilly. After reading that, I can go back to dealing with insurance schtuff without going postal. Posted by Terry Whynott (Member # 1622) on :
Bravo!
That was some fun reading! Posted by Si Allen (Member # 420) on :
I discovered the figs while still in my niteshirt, Ate and ate and ate, till I started to squirt!
Posted by Kathy Joiner (Member # 1814) on :
Jill, that was great. You're quite a poet, thanks for taking the time to give us a little Christmas cheer.
Posted by Janette Balogh (Member # 192) on :
Oh now, this is one for the Letterville history books! I'm printing it out.
Jill that was fabulous! Still chuckling, Nettie
Posted by Jane Diaz (Member # 595) on :
Jill, you are a stitch! That really was a hoot! (I can't wait to meet you for real!)
Posted by Delzell (Member # 1965) on :
Wow Jill! Your a poet and don't know it
Very well done!
Posted by Kelly Thorson (Member # 2958) on :
But the best gift of all, Santa saved for Jill, From Letterheads One and All, a huge sack of goodwill! Thanks for spreading sunshine, Jilly. Posted by Suelynn Sedor (Member # 442) on :
That was awesome Jill!!!
Thanks for the smile.
Suelynn
Posted by KARYN BUSH (Member # 1948) on :
haha..what a poet!!! just for future reference...karYn... jilly you're so silly Posted by Randy Campbell (Member # 2675) on :
I guess i'm one of the bald men with wigs???? great writing Jill. Posted by Stevo Chartrand (Member # 2094) on :
Yeah! Jillybeans thanx for the chuckle.
I could use a '63 Chev to stripe and flame out.
Stevo
Posted by Harris Kohen (Member # 2139) on :
A ballgag for Fran, HMMM your too nice!!!
Posted by Barb. Shortreed (Member # 1730) on :
Great poem Jill:)
I was laughing all day as I keep thinking about it Posted by Donna in BC (Member # 130) on :
LOL!!!!
Silly Jilly we call her Cody digs her purple hair I just dig her cuz she writes with such flair
Posted by Mark Matyjakowski (Member # 294) on :
HaHaHa that is great. The "Instant Menace" (I still get a chuckle from that) strikes again. Posted by Stephen Deveau (Member # 1305) on :
How I love you JILL!
This really made my day......
Thanks.
Oh! by the way MERRY HO! HO! Posted by Jillbeans (Member # 1912) on :
Back at the Pole, Santa jumped from his sled Eager to visit Mrs. Claus in their bed.
He heard a small sound,and looked down in the bottom Saw a bundle, all shivering, a gift he'd forgotten.
He picked it up...OOF! Nearly popped out a gut And opened it POP! He was expecting a mutt...
When out of this bundle emerged a short lady With her big grin and pink hair, she looked somewhat shady!
"Is it you, Jillbeans, you naughty little pest? IMing Heads madly like a drunk party guest?"
"Spilling your stories to heads who are strangers? Didn't your mom warn you of the dangers?"
"Your punishment, Girly, will be very severe... You are sentenced to WalMart, Hell at this time of year!"
So Jilly was shipped to a store in Kentucky Made to hunt for Hokey-Pokey Elmo...she never got lucky!
And there she remains in this Hell oh so snazzy Walking the aisles all glittered and jazzy.
No more will she wake in the dawn's early light IMing something clever to make someone's day bright,
She is tucking her pink tail between her chubby short legs Promising not to IM even if she hears begs!
Resigning to contact only Heads whom she knows And telling herself, this is just how life goes...
You can make some folks happy with a quick instant pop-up Others it annoys and makes them want to throw up!
So if my spreading good will has caused any duress I simply say "IGNORE IT" and I must confess-
Life is too short for griping, I am here for a reason And my cause today is to wish yins a Happy Holiday Season!
'Nuff said. Posted by pierre (Member # 1462) on :
What's a "yins"??
Posted by Jillbeans (Member # 1912) on :
Pierre... "YINS" is Pittsburghese/Southwestern Pennsylvanian slang: It means "you guys" "youse" "y'all"... See Also "Youns" love JILL
Posted by Amy Brown (Member # 1963) on :
That was great Jill!
Thanks for the smile.
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year..........
Posted by Ray Rheaume (Member # 3794) on :
That's awesome, Jill.
Definitely one for the keeping.
LMAO Rapid
Posted by jack wills (Member # 521) on :
Thanks for the neat Pop Jill, I got all fuzzy ya see.......! Yooz has got it going.
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jilly you're so silly 
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