Click the photo to see how magnificent he is . . .
Friends,
Today is the day. Just ten days shy of his 6th birthday, we are choosing to euthanize our Golden Retriever, Cooper. We are going to have the mobile veterinarian come here to the house around 3pm – in familiar surroundings for all of us. Jody and Evan and I all really appreciate your thoughts and sentiments since we found out Coop was stricken with cancer back in early March.
Jody’s bond with Cooper over the last 8 weeks deepened – and was nothing short of incredible. At night, when I came home for dinner (a ‘habit’ I discovered when he got sick!!), we would round the curve and head into the cul-de-sac – and he would bark out the window all the way into the garage – telling all our neighbors he was home to see Jody. As soon as he saw his ‘Mama’, all was well again for him.
He was ‘home’ . . .
After Jody’s loss of her 22 year old cat just last September, this was a real challenge for her. She became ‘Super Mom’ . . . and I respect her deeply for that strength. I think Cooper turned her into a ‘dog person’ instead . . . now THAT is a personality!!
At work, Cooper bonded with my employees – as well as every customer, deliveryman or bank teller. I am so sorry to put them in a situation like this. While he was a great distraction for all of us – in a busy workday world – he became somewhat of an Ambassador of my business. I know that Joe and Carmen will be especially saddened (and Bryan too!!) – but I want them to know how much I appreciated their reciprocal love for Cooper. He stole their hearts as well.
Quite often he would go to the back dock of the company next door, climb in the UPS truck to get a treat from his favorite driver – who would then drop him off at our door – even if we had no deliveries that day. What an engaging personality . . . we are so lucky to have experienced such great beauty and charm. What great stories we have as memories.
If Jody and I had not chased down every conceivable article on canine cancers, proper diet, consultations with local vets – and Jody even getting to talk with teaching professors at the U.W. Veterinary College, we would probably send him to his next life with some personal regrets. By doing so, we guaranteed ourselves that no matter what, we did all we could to first save, and then extend his life a little longer. No regrets.
I so wanted him to be 6 years old and live to 11 or 12 – and I so wanted Jody to experience the wisdom, love, intuition and strength of a mature Golden Retriever. He went from 5 to 12 years old almost overnight, though. Our ball playing, stuffed animal tossing, snow loving companion – and ‘brother’ to Evan since the 7th grade – no longer did any of those things. Friday before last – and the week before that – I took him to Rock Cut State Park to swim – in preparation for what MIGHT come. It turns out I made a great choice. He was – for those two Friday nights – the vibrant dog we once lived with and loved. Though slower than he normally would have been – and ready to leave more quickly – you could see that gleam in his eye that had been missing.
For all the love we give and get in this world, parting with any always comes with such great personal pain. But it is now Cooper’s pain that we must try to alleviate. His ‘quality of life’ is gone. Our only responsibility as the owner’s of pets is to comfort them – especially at their end of days with us. It is an unwritten contract.
And so we will have the mobile vet come tonight. He’ll be given his shot to make him sleep – and that will be the last time he sees us – and feels any discomfort. Then comes the shot to stop his heart . . . I pray the needle is unnoticeable – and the medicine is the largest possible dose they can give . . . as that incredible heart of his may just be too big to stop.
We were often told he was ‘polite’ . . . so common was that same word mentioned by all he met . . . ‘polite'. He’s my 4th Golden Retriever . . . but I never had one with such an incredibly engaging personality with every single person he ever met. Replacement is futile. Memories are full.
As with anyof our loved ones, we don’t ever want to say goodbye forever. But that’s just how it works. Thanks once again for your support and kindness – I hope you fully understand how much it meant to us. It made us better for Cooper in return.
Cooper Allen . . . born May 14th, 2003 . . . sired by Grand Champions and dearly loved by his real family until his last day . . . May 4th, 2009 . . .
We’ll never forget you, Coopies. We'll see you on the other side, Big Boy . . .. . . there’s enough memories you left with us for a lifetime. If we’re lucky, we’ll experience the same beauty we found with you again someday.
Peace.
[ May 04, 2009, 11:10 AM: Message edited by: Jay Allen ]
Posted by Duncan Wilkie (Member # 132) on :
My heart goes out to you and your family Jay. I know exactly what you've been through and what lies ahead in the next months. Losing a beloved dog is heartbreaking, that's a fact. I haven't yet totally come to terms with losing our Elsie, but the healing is slowly happening. It may not feel like it now Jay, but it will come. Cooper has left a permanent mark on your hearts and will live there forever. God Bless you at this challenging time.
Posted by Michael Clanton (Member # 2419) on :
Sorry to hear- I know it is a painful thing to lose a close family member (pet is not really an appropriate description)
About 4 years ago, our Bullie/Lab mix started having really bad seizures- over the weekend, of course. He got real bad really fast, and the vet determined that he was to the point of being brain dead. It didn't take much longer for him to fall asleep for the last time.
My son (who was about 10) and I spent the afternoon digging a grave for Mongo, talking about life and death, crying and laughing- My wife and son painted some rocks for a headstone- with several cartoons of animals that Mongo loved to chase, and we topped the grave off with his metal food bowl that he drug around the yard.
Posted by Raymond Chapman (Member # 361) on :
It's hard to loose a family member, and that is exactly what are pets are to us. We've had the same experience with two and it was never easy.
My thoughts are with you.
Posted by Doug Allan (Member # 2247) on :
Great photos Jay. Thanks for sharing. I feel for your loss. I met my wife 13 years ago & she had 2 dogs, both 2 years old, brother and sister shepard/retrievers.
Bear was the brother & after after 11 years of sharing our lives, he was the first pet I experienced losing. Bear died of a cancer that we also did all we could for.
After months of acupuncture, while waiting for the arrival of a specialist surgeon to the island, we had our goodbye time & when we learned his condition was not operable, we soon found ourselves facing a day like yours today.
Koa, Bear's sister is 15-1/2 I think she made that first loss a little more bearable for me, but I have to remind myself I needed to learn to endure that loss because there will be more like it. In Coopers photos on the beach, he looks quite a bit like my last photos of Bear on his last day when we took him to the beach.
Posted by Jane Diaz (Member # 595) on :
We are ALL so sorry about Cooper! Hang in there. Some day you will look back and only be glad you had him around and not just sad you lost him....It does leave a hole in your heart for a while though. We will be thinking of you today....
Posted by Jon Butterworth (Member # 227) on :
I had two burmese cats. Rufus the red was 17 and Mia the blue was 16.
Both are behind my shed with a flowering tree planted over them ... it reminds me every time see the flowers!
[ May 04, 2009, 12:45 PM: Message edited by: Jon Butterworth ]
Posted by Joey Madden (Member # 1192) on :
I am so sorry but know exactly how you all feel
Posted by Jim Moser (Member # 6526) on :
I have had five dogs over the years and it is alway hard to say goodby. They give their Love and Affection unconditionally...a lesson we all can learn from them. Godspeed Cooper !
Posted by Glenn Taylor (Member # 162) on :
I feel for you Jay. I had to do the same thing a few years ago with my buddy, Butch.
His former owner had abused him horribly and led to a badly damaged hip that was never properly treated.
We got him when he was a couple years old. Simply put, he was my buddy. He was family. He was such a sweetheart. I could never figure out why anyone would treat him so badly.
Sadly, age and the injured hip caught up with him. His heart was strong but he just didn't have the strength to stand up without a lot of pain and effort.
I cradled him while the vet did his job. I balled like a baby. He was my buddy.
Posted by Neil D. Butler (Member # 661) on :
Please accept my Condolences, I have an 11 year old Lab, and she is starting to slow, I think of what you must be going through, and it has to be really hard.
Posted by bill riedel (Member # 607) on :
Jay and Jody, I am sorry you are losing such a good friend. You were lucky to have had as much time as you had, and lucky to have experienced such a special personality. You are left with many good memories and pictures. Bill
Posted by David Harding (Member # 108) on :
I feel for you, Jay. I've been through it more than once. They really do become part of the family.
Posted by jimmy chatham (Member # 525) on :
i feel for you. i have had to put one of mine to sleep after 20.5 years. i made her a casket and had her a tombstone made. i am a big dog lover i have 6 buried in my backyard. i am down to 1 german shepard now. she is 16 years old.
Posted by Dale Manor (Member # 4858) on :
I'm sorry for the loss of your dear family member Jay. I too have lost a fine dog with an incredible personality and it is very difficult thing to go through.
I had the pleasure of meeting Mr. Cooper at your shop back in may of '06 and could tell right off he was an "Old Soul".
Writing through the tears and keeping you all in my thoughts.
Take care mate
Posted by Barb. Shortreed (Member # 1730) on :
Sorry for your loss Jay.
Posted by Kent Smith (Member # 251) on :
And the same from Me, Judi and Audri too.
Posted by Donna in BC (Member # 130) on :
So very very sorry for your loss, Jay, Jody and Evan.
[ May 05, 2009, 03:08 AM: Message edited by: Donna in BC ]
Posted by Dan Kearfott (Member # 3756) on :
Jay, What a tragic story, it brought tears to my eyes reading it. Anyone who has ever had a pet knows how you feel. You can at least feel good that you did everything you could before having to put her to sleep. What a hard decision to make. The problem with having pets is that you generally outlive them and have to deal with the pain of loosing them. But there's no doubt in my mind that Cooper had a great home and a wonderful life! My condolences Ol' Buddy and God Bless You.
Posted by KARYN BUSH (Member # 1948) on :
oh i feel your pain...so sorry for your loss. i have 3 goldens...they are the best for sure! i lost one to cancer at age 7...and i lost 1 to old age at 13 yrs. there's nothing like the unconditional love of a pet. i hope your pain eases with each passing day.
Posted by Mike Faig (Member # 6104) on :
Jay, your writing makes the tears well up in even my eyes. I feel for you and your extended family. It makes me happy to know Cooper had such a fine life.
Posted by Dave Sherby (Member # 698) on :
I too feel for you Jay. Your story brought tears to my eyes as it reminded me once again of my springer Rocky. Rocky used to love to go out to the woods where I pretended to hunt grouse while he ran all over the place. I used to have to literally drag him out of the truck when we'd get back home. He loved the woods but it proved to be his undoing. Rocky contracted Lime disease from a tick bite before they knew about Lime. It was painful to see him struggle to even lift his head his arthritis from the Lime's was so bad. The vet recommended that we put him down as his quality of life was so poor and getting worse. What hurt even more was a couple years later they learned about Lime disease and how to eliminate it. Hang tough Allen family. Your lives are better off with your 6 short years with Cooper. And you made his short life as good as it gets too. My condolences.
Posted by Jay Allen (Member # 195) on :
My dear Letterhead friends . . . sometimes it seems only pet owners seem to grasp the realities of playing God and choosing euthanasia for their beloved animals. It is one of the most gut wrenching decisions you can make . . . but even with our loved ones - our family members - times like these are unavoidable and sad.
But after consultation today with the vets we had involved with through this, we made a very good and necessary decision.
Saturday he started showing blood in his urine - Sunday he got a nosebleed and we had to go the emergency vet clinic . . . all the vets involved agreed that an unspeakably tragic death was very, very near - and we got to circumvent it.
And the dog that was described as 'polite' (such an odd choice of adjectives but the one we heard freakishly often) by so many was 'polite' yet again in his helping us avoid a tragic memory.
Instead, this dog barked when the Mobile Vet came to our home, greeted her at her vehicle, and did what he always did with people he met, he shoved his head and shoulders between her shins and pushed for all he was worth . . . "pet me, pet me" . . .
At that point I think the vet thought we were nuts putting down such a vibrant dog. But as I explained about our weekend, she informed me also that we probably were avoiding a very tragic ending.
His corticosteroids I gave him yesterday morning - and the remanining medication he'd gotten the night prior at the clinic - gave him a pretty good day - all things considered. He went to work with me to say goodbye (my employees were devastated as he truly was a dog 'with many master') and my wife picked him up after she left work early to take him to McDonald's for a plain cheeseburger - which he had never, ever been given. (though drooled over many!!)
They went home together - and even though he'd refused meat-based foods for 5 days prior, he gobbled it down like most of us would . . . We got to where he'd only eat bread, noodles or rice - and even those were being eaten less on Friday, Saturday and Sunday.
He knew it was his time and he faced it with bravery. My 17 year old son showed up - watched and cried with us - and I am thankful for him experiencing that lesson . . . however he processes it.
We cried as the vet quietly left, held his limp body for a while and spoke about how happy we were to have had him - and that his suffering was over. The cremation people showed up shortly after and we can pick up his real remains (they assured us they only do one at a time) on Wed. or Thursday . . .
He was a real survivor - and Golden Retrievers are very stoic and don't show pain - so we knew when he had his really bad days that we'd have to face this . . . 8 weeks exactly from his first appointment to address his lameness to his last day . . . waaaay too soon.
The silence this morning was as deafening as the tears and crying were last night . . . my 'cargo' no longer gets loaded in the truck to come to work.
Golden's are people dogs . . . we met more people in being with him as his 'Wal-Mart Greeter' personality would find us getting him out of neighbor's garages, patios, decks and anyplace where there were people gathered so he could say 'hello' . . .
THAT is the essence of the breed.
Inasmuch as that fact is considered, most of us experience our pets in our off-times. We see them morning and nights and weekends . . .
My Golden . . . Cooper . . . got a life some dogs dream of. Daily contact here at work - almost every day from when we first got him. Many masters - but many sad and affected hearts in his life's wake.
For that, I will be forever gateful.
Cancer is epidemic in Golden's now - younger and younger, cancer is being seen at alarming rates as early as 2 . . . I just don't know right now if I can go through that again - considering that fact.
But the breed . . . is the only breed I'd ever have. Maybe time will let us know the right thing to do . . . and I hope and pray it does.
I'll honor my dog with a trip to the local lake with his ashes, to our back yard at work, around our back yard at home, down the streets of our subdivision - and to the little park we walked through so many, many times.
Love your family, your pets and your friends a bit more today . . . you never know what tomorrow brings.
My thanks to all of you here . . . what wonderful sentiments for someone many of you truly don't 'know' . . . but somehow that didn't matter.
I am moved deeply and thank you on my family's behalf for your words and kindness . . .
Peace.
Posted by Rusty Bradley (Member # 6938) on :
What a dog...sounds like he was a charmer...I know you guys will miss him greatly...we took our cat into the emergency vet on Sunday...she passed away on Monday...when she first came to our house...tattered and hunger...you couldn't get within 6' of her...even with food...I slowly worked with her to gain her trust and before long she became our beloved family cat...that was 8 years ago...but came to an end on Monday...maybe Coopies and Puff Kitty are somewhere doing those dog and cat things they loved so much...probably not...but they will remain in our memories forever.
Posted by Dan Sawatzky (Member # 88) on :
I've been away from my desk fo the last few days and was saddenned to hear this news. My heart goes out to you Jay.
-grampa dan
Posted by Todd Gill (Member # 2569) on :
Sad day for sure....
I've had to put down 2 golden retrievers and a Mini Schnauzer....all of whom were as close as any human companion ever was....so I know exactly where you're coming from.
Posted by Janette Balogh (Member # 192) on :
yeah, it's a hurt that is like no other.
Posted by Deb Fowler (Member # 1039) on :
Jay, I lose sleep over this kind of sadness. I feel your pain too. At least it was a humane goodbye and you had a qualified person and love around your puppy.
When I was in Ohio, I was fortunate enough to be able to donate magnetic signs for a rescue group for Golden Retrievers called: "Golden Endings".
Please accept my condolences, Deb
Posted by Judy Grossman (Member # 235) on :
Oh Jay, I couldn't read your whole story because the tears came. I had to put Clifford down 5 years ago, and I still miss him miserably. Haven't been able to replace him yet or maybe ever.
My heart goes out to you and your family. It is a sad time. What a valiant soul he was.
Posted by David C. Petri (Member # 6645) on :
I know this is a hard thing to go through, Jay. Our golden retriever/chow mix, Daisy, is sixteen years old with a list of health issues and I am having a difficult time facing the reality of what has to be done. The denial is coming to an end for me, and now the plan is being thought out with much apprehension and sadness. I think Daisy would appreciate a cheeseburger too. Wow, I can't even write about it.
Posted by Deb Fowler (Member # 1039) on :
I also wanted to share that I had a black lab, golden retriever named Mindy. She had to be put down also, but I feel so guilty as it was due to her loneliness after I left home. She tried to climb over the fence and tore herself. I discovered this when I stopped in to my Mom's the day after it happened.
My step dad and hubby took her to the vet and we had to put her down. I've never been able to shake that sadness. It's good to lean on others but the pain is still there. Now I am involved in animal rescue with friends and acquaintances. It's just what I feel is right.
